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Snapping & driving is dangerous. Texting & driving is dangerous, we know, but snapping & driving is, like, NOT BETTER.

Snapping & driving is a drug. You feel great, you’re being so efficient, you look great (can’t argue with window lighting…), but you’re also a freaking idiot. And you could kill somebody.

In honor of not wanting to kill humans, I am hereby declaring I am quitting snapping & driving.

It’s 4:45 pm, which means I’ve been driving for... almost 9 hours sober now. I’ve learned a lot of things.

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The music on the radio is crap.

I hardly ever listen to the radio because I apparently feel like I have many more important things to be doing while I’m driving, but now that I’m just, like, staring at the road, I feel like 106.1 should be a great distraction. It is not. I spent like 12 minutes today trying to figure out what in God’s name the song was saying and then I just turned it off. 89.3 all the way for me. Or silence.

But podcasts are awesome.

I’m about to learn so many things. I have been listening to Jennypurr’s podcast “Make It Happen” (WHICH I SO HAPPEN TO BE FEATURED ON TODAY!! GO LISTEN!), and I’m like all kinds of inspired now. And listening to a podcast and driving is so efficient. I love being efficient. I might even listen to a sports podcast, maybe the Russillo show, then I could like really impress the mister with so much knowledge. #johnwoulddie

My car is filthy.

Now that I like really have to look through the windshield I’m like how did I ever see through this windshield.

I need to do my nails.

What else am I supposed to look at at stoplights?

We live in a beautiful area.

I drove down to Nipomo today to see one of my bride’s venues (wedding is in 45 days!) and I kept tricking myself that I was driving through a different country. If you tell yourself you’re driving through Ireland, you really appreciate the green(ish) hills we so often glaze over. Or are completely ignoring because we aren’t looking out the window or at the road.

People are freaking idiots.

When you start paying attention to other people on the road, you realize nobody is paying attention. This became very clear to me when I went on a motorcycle road trip a few weeks ago, but now it’s like 100% crystal clear that people are operating heavy machinery under IDIOCY all the time. Be careful on the roads people, the idiots are out.

I have to rest when I get home.

I have a lot of catching up to do as soon as I get home. Like, Paige just left & we have to snap all day to make up for the fact that we can’t see each other. I have to check my giveaway on Instagram to find out who wins. (Friday I’m giving away goodies from lululemon!) I have to respond to John’s dozens of texts about everything under the sun because him and I can’t go minutes without talking to each other because we love each other like a lot. So, when I got home today, I like SAT DOWN & ate my lunch & caught up on smart phone things. It was, actually, kind of nice. I mean it was only nice because I was also eating lunch at the same time, otherwise the irritatingly efficient (read: stupidly multitasking) part of me would be like “Ugghhhhh why are we wasting so much time just eating” (These are actual thoughts I have sometimes.) (But I still eat.) (Every day.) (Like three or four times.) But I shut that part of me down, like “GIRLLL I’m eating and texting. And snapping. And Instagramming. PSH I am SO EFFICIENT.” (This is me talking to myself.)

I now have a lot more down time than I think.

Driving is now down time. Driving is not time to catch up on any kind of communication, I communicate plenty during not so dangerous activities. Now, I have just added hours of down time to my week, time to plan blog posts in my head (like this one), time to pray, time to thank God that I have never killed anybody with my vehicle, or time to just zone out. Which is good for your brain. (Zone out in like a still pay attention to the road kind of way.)